Relationships

     Relationships are highly undervalued. The relationship between you and your mother, your father, your brother, your sister, your best friends, your boyfriend, your teacher, etcetera. Every single relationship is special and can never be like another and all of these matter. Many failed relationships occur in our lives in order for us to learn from them and how to better protect ourselves from the evils in our world, while many of successful ones still exist in our lives to demonstrate to us that it is possible and just how amazing life can be. Things happen, people change for the good or worse and you either adapt to their new ways or have no other choice but to move on for the better because what they provided at some point is no longer there for your benefit. What many people do not realize is that all these distinct relationships between all the people in your life play a large role in your future and your decisions. They are extremely important and you must pay close attention to each and every single one of them because they do affect you whether you accept it or not.

     The two key factors in maintaining any healthy relationship are trust and communication. The minute one of these factors fails to take place, the relationship between you and that individual begins to spiral downwards. If you think about the reason why many relationships have failed miserably, is because they lacked one of these components. If a female heard a drastic rumor about her boyfriend and believed it to be true and then decides to make a tragic decision and end the relationship between the two, this would be an example of lack of trust. If you have an issue with your best friend and because you wish to not make things awkward or ruin the great friendship between you two and choose to remain silent and hold it in instead rather than discuss it, you would be lacking communication. The absence of trust and communication only result negatively and the worst part is that they do not only ruin that particular relationship but many more to come. Why? You begin to doubt further relationships because you have been hurt before and feel that those people who may simply be innocent will do the same. This is important in relationships between you and your other half as well as new friendships, simply because you only have one mother, one father and so many brothers and sisters that could never be replaced.     

     It has been said that if you surround yourself with optimistic people, you have a higher chance of receiving those positive vibes and indulging in that nature just as if you were to surround yourself with pessimistic people, you would engage in that matter. This is primarily true and you can see this happen to weak individuals especially at the adolescence age.         Although many would like to claim that what someone does to them or says to them does not affect them, it does. We like to think that we have the ability to disregard other people’s thoughts and opinions about us yet all the proof is right there. We tend to care way too much what someone thinks about us that we are willing to dress to impress and do things that we may not be comfortable with to prove ourselves to others even if they are strangers, ironically enough. The saddest part is that we tend to ignore those who love us the most and seek the ones who ignore us. Now, why is that? Well, unfortunately enough, as human beings it is in our nature to crave the attention of those who we cannot have or do not necessarily want us back. This is bad because it can result in damaging many relationships in the future. Since we already know that we have the attention from those who love us, we do not feel like there is anything we need to do to fight for that relationship until we begin to lose it.

     It is important that we re-evaluate ourselves and seek the correct attention. We do not realize how much another human being can impact our decisions on numerous things, especially since we live in a world inhabited by only human beings as far as our direct interaction.People need to be much more careful about who they associate themselves with and if they are communicating with more negative groups to do what they can to not let it affect them. It is also extremely important to further yourself from those who are doing you no good any longer. It will be difficult,  especially if you share blood with any of these individuals or if they meant so much to you at some point in your life, but you must think about your happiness first before anyone else's. Instead of fearing change, we should be learning how to embrace it. 

5 Possible Prompts For Masterpiece Essay

1) How can a simple act of human compassion cause great change on an individual's life and overall to the world itself? 

2) Explain the importance of healthy relationships and their effects on human beings.

3) Why do our emotions play such a large role in absolutely everything we do even though many would like to claim they do not?

4) Why is it so difficult for human beings to accept change and move on and instead choose to remain attached to the past?

5) Why do human beings in a first world society fail to see the game we are unfortunately caught up in and tend to value the small things in life much less than someone in a less stabilized country would?

PEER REVIEW

1) Matthew Berumen:http:  //matthewberumen327.blogspot.com/

PROS: The content was great and he kept up to date with the given assignments.
CONS: Could possibly add more color rather than a single one to attract more viewers.

2) Loren Birdsall:  http://lorenbirdsallcompexpos.blogspot.com/

PROS: Colors were relaxed and engaging for that reason as well as up to date with every assignment.
CONS: Has all assignments as it should but she could probably add more random however relevant posts.

3) Jake Dickens:  http://jdickensrhs14exposcomp.blogspot.com/

PROS: Blog is nice and organized as well as easy to navigate through. I enjoyed the touch of personality to this blog.
CONS: Could post more about other things that interest him other than our assignments.

4) Tiana McMann:  http://tianamcmann.blogspot.com/

PROS: Blog was rich in content as well as lengthy which has been difficult to find. It also had a nice touch of personality. 
CONS: She can post more about her travels and experiences in regards to her masterpiece field.

5) Erik Santos:  http://eriksantosrhs14exposcomp.blogspot.com/

PROS: Absolutely love the background and the video post was a touch of individuality that I have not yet seen on any other blog.
CONS: Definitely needs to keep more up to date!

MY VOCABULARY #2

1) Astral (adj) -pertaining to or proceeding from the stars, stellar, star-shaped
2) Cognitive (adj) -of or pertaining to the mental process of perception, memory, judgment, and     reasoning; contrasted with emotional processes
3) Exuberant (adj) -effusively and almost uninhibitedly enthusiastic; lavishly abundant 
4) Immersive (adj) -pertaining to digital technology or images that deeply involve one's senses and may create an altered state of mind
5) Profane (adj) -not devoted to holy or religious purposes

6) Altruism (n) -the principle or practice of unselfish concern for or devotion to the welfare of others; opposed to egoism

7) Assertion (n) -a positive statement or declaration, often without support or reason

8) Derision (n) -ridicule; mockery

9) Fickle (adj) -likely to change, especially due to caprice, irresolution, or instability; casually changeable

10) Oblique (adj) -neither perpendicular nor parallel to a given line or surface; slanting; sloping

11) Alleged (adj) -declared or stated to be as described ; doubtful, suspect
12) Filial (adj) -of or pertaining to a son or daughter 
13) Introverts (n) -a person characterized by concern primarily with his or her own thoughts and feelings; shy person
14) Mediocre (adj) -of only ordinary or moderate quality; neither good nor bad 
15) Wast (v) -second person singular indicative or be

16) Abhor (v) -to regard with extreme repugnance or disgust; detest utterly, loathe 
17) Compensate (v) -to counterbalance, offset, be equivalent to
18) Engendered (v)  -to produce, cause or give rise to; procreate
19) Reciprocate (v) -to give and receive, feel, to cause to move alternately backward and froward
20) Taboo (adj) -proscribed by society as improper or unacceptable 

Ways to Improve Learning At School & Home

http://www.edudemic.com/5-proven-ways-students-can-learn-better/

My Masterpiece Field: Helping Others

Ways To Improve Learning 

-Receiving the passing grades does not necessarily mean that the student is comprehending the material 
-Successful human beings learn to implement structure and organization in their lives
-Routines help dispel power struggles, boost cooperation, relieve stress, become more independent and responsible for their own tasks, build long-term goals as well as sleep routines resulting in a positive health
-A physical environment for studying in silence is very important while providing all needed materials 
-Children that have high curiosity tend to be better learners and more self-motivated in school
-Questions should never be discouraged
-Integrating technology in a technology advancing planet would be the smart thing to do instead of disregarding it
-Communication and building a relationship with your teachers 
-Instead of sticking to the old ways in many cases change can be good; we must learn to move with the current and adapt to new important discoveries just as we have with lights, cars, telephones etc.

5 Vocab Words

Abhor (v) -to regard with extreme repugnance or disgust; detest utterly, loathe 
Compensate (v) -to counterbalance, offset, be equivalent to
Engendered (v)  -to produce, cause or give rise to; procreate
Reciprocate (v) -to give and receive, feel, to cause to move alternately backward and froward
Taboo (adj) -proscribed by society as improper or unacceptable   

Seeds of Compassion

http://www.seedsofcompassion.org/why/

My Masterpiece Field: Helping Others

Brain Development 

-Social and emotional development is defined as a person's capacity to identify, understand, experience, manage and express a full range of positive and negative emotions
-Ability to develop empathy for others as well as develop healthy relationships with others as actively explore the environment and learn with it
-Emotions are biologically built into the structure of a young person's brain 
-Studies have shown that the critical brain connections that determine emotional, social and intellectual development form through early relationships depending on how much activity and attention they are given
-Parents and caregivers strongly affect the wiring of their brain through interactions
-First step in cultivating human compassion is to develop empathy for your fellow humans
-Thankfully, humans are wired to respond to others in need 
-Social and emotional development is crucial and of utmost importance because it is the foundation of and preparation for school and in life 

5 Vocab Words

Alleged (adj) -declared or stated to be as described ; doubtful, suspect
Filial (adj) -of or pertaining to a son or daughter 
Introverts (n) -a person characterized by concern primarily with his or her own thoughts and feelings; shy person
Mediocre (adj) -of only ordinary or moderate quality; neither good nor bad 
Wast (v) -second person singular indicative or be

Human Compassion

http://greatergood.berkeley.edu/article/item/the_compassionate_instinct

My Masterpiece Field: Helping Others 

The Compassionate Instinct

-Plato compared the human soul to a chariot: the intellect is the driver and the emotions are the horses; life is a continual struggle to keep the emotions under control

-Compassion and benevolence, this research suggests, are an evolved part of human nature, rooted in our brain and biology, and ready to be cultivated for the greater good

-University of Wisconsin psychologist Jack Nitschke found in an experiment that when mothers looked at pictures of their babies, they not only reported feeling more compassionate love than when they saw other babies

-they also demonstrated unique activity in a region of their brains associated with the positive emotions

-Nitschke’s finding suggests that this region of the brain is attuned to the first objects of our compassion, our offspring!

-Joshua Greene and Jonathan Cohen of Princeton University found that when subjects contemplated harm being done to others, a similar network of regions in their brains lit up

-Suggests that compassion is an innate human response embedded into the folds of our brains

-Helping others triggered activity in the caudate nucleus and anterior cingulate, portions of the brain that turn on when people receive rewards or experience pleasure

-This is a rather remarkable finding: helping others brings the same pleasure we get from the gratification of personal desire

-The brain, then, seems wired up to respond to others’ suffering—indeed, it makes us feel good when we can alleviate that suffering

5 Vocab Words

Altruism (n) -the principle or practice of unselfish concern for or devotion to the welfare of others; opposed to egoism

Assertion (n) -a positive statement or declaration, often without support or reason

Derision (n) -ridicule; mockery

Fickle (adj) -likely to change, especially due to caprice, irresolution, or instability; casually changeable

Oblique (adj) -neither perpendicular nor parallel to a given line or surface; slanting; sloping

WELCOME TO THE INTERDISCIPLINARITY

My field of study is to help others, strictly deriving from my chosen major- sociology and psychology two of which are very rarely studied in any high school classroom, therefore, making it very difficult to give background information on. The subjects taught at school that I do feel may have a somewhat correlation with my field of inquiry could quite possibly be English, History and Art. Since my field of study involves much emotion and mental processes, it is from these three that I have managed to gain something from. Especially with English, this subject encourages us to seek our inner spirit and speak the truth of what we feel, think and believe through the usage of words as our form of expression. It was during an English class sophomore year that I discovered my life's vocation. To prepare and be able to predict for the future, we first must be able to understand the past. This is where history plays in. If we do not understand why certain people made certain choices that could have caused either great tragedy or triumph, then we will never understand one of the most important things on the planet- the way humans think and why they made the choices they made. And finally, Art. This subject is undervalued at school and although it may be difficult to appreciate if you have absolutely no artistic ability other than creativity such as myself, it can play an important role in your everyday school life. Art helps us express ourselves in ways that cannot be written or perhaps explained concretely but through images and symbols while simultaneously allowing us to escape mentally and give our souls the freedom it deserves, and this is healthy. Other than English, History and Art, I cannot think of any more basic general common subjects that would be beneficial to my field of study that all students are required to take in high school. 

Applying Rationality

http://rationality.org/workshops/

My masterpiece field: Helping Others

Center for Applied Rationality

-created to give people a better understanding or control of their decisions and behavior
-research has shown how brains actually work, and what we can do to improve them
-techniques range reasoning from probability to decision making theory
-not just about understanding these techniques intellectually but applying them to your everyday life
-purpose to reach a state of mental clarity farther than you thought possible just as many in life should gain


5 Vocab Words

Astral (adj) -pertaining to or proceeding from the stars, stellar, star-shaped
Cognitive (adj) -of or pertaining to the mental process of perception, memory, judgment, and reasoning; contrasted with emotional processes
Exuberant (adj) -effusively and almost uninhibitedly enthusiastic; lavishly abundant 
Immersive (adj) -pertaining to digital technology or images that deeply involve one's senses and may create an altered state of mind
Profane (adj) -not devoted to holy or religious purposes

Understanding is key.

Look around...

Recently, it has come to my attention that I tend to pay attention to the smaller things in life that many find irrelevant to spend time thinking about. Things that probably NO ONE thinks about. I find myself slowly getting lost in my wonderland asking a lot of the time "How did they build this?" or "Who thought of this?" It amazes that people pay very little attention to the things they utilize every single day of their lives. I do not quite understand how many people do not even bother to think about how amazing it is that a such thing like the internet exists, or the fact that I am able to fully connect through the phone with my aunt in Mexico who is 1,000 miles away! Or how the steering wheel of a car can easily manage to make four wheels turn perfectly in the direction in which you please, or how an airplane weighing tons is able to float miles high in the sky and not fall, or how we were able to send a human being to the MOON! The things humans have accomplished in the past centuries are truly astonishing and it makes me think of the things that we have yet to create.
I still feel like we do not appreciate the things that make our world go round. It is almost like we are mind robots, imprisoned in our own bodies by the media and the way humans have constructed our society to be. I hope many of you begin to appreciate your surroundings and all the things we have done in the world and be grateful that we have luxuries and not just necessities. I would like to take the time to tell whoever is reading this that they need not think that any idea of theirs is far too foolish because there is much more that can and will be done. 

LAUNCH

When we were first assigned this task I was a bit confused, mainly because I had never been given the option to choose finally for myself something that I actually craved to accomplish. Then I thought back my life experiences and knowledge and what I really wanted to this in my lifetime. My passion has always been to help those around me, whether it be physically, mentally or emotionally. I love to be there for others, especially because I have experienced so much that I am able to relate and give helpful advice for their problems. But digging in more deeply and thinking about this, I have realized that I want to do much more than that, I want to change lives and make positive impacts on the planet. There is so much that needs to be changed for the better and so little time, but working together with others we can get a lot done. 

I am still not too sure exactly what to do with my passion as far as an actual solid idea and plan, I am still thinking but I am 100% sure on the fact that my project will definitely involve helping others. I have been attempting to think BIG this entire time but I have also realized that that is maybe not the place to begin especially since I only have a direction and not a plan. I guess to reach big, you first need to begin small and eventually my ideas will expand. I still need more help and discussion with others on what to do. Regardless, Dr. Preston has been doing a really great job in transforming this "assignment" from a HAVE TO one to a WANT TO actually do one.  

MY VOCABULARY #1

1) Faux (adj) -artificial or imitation
2) Fruition (n) -attainment of anything desired; enjoyment
3) Gratifications (n) -great satisfaction
4) Levanter (n) - a strong Easterly wind in the Mediterranean 
5) Neogolize (v) -to make or use new words to create meanings for existing words

6) Deem (v) -to form or have an opinion, to judge
7) Exhibit (v) -to offer or expose to view
8) Hostility (n) -antagonism, enmity, unfriendliness  
9) Orchestrate (v) -to arrange or manipulate, especially by means of clever or thorough planning or maneuvering
10) Relinquish (v) -to renounce, surrender, to give up 


11) Commercialism (n) -the principles, practices and spirit of commerce; inappropriate or excessive emphasis on profit
12) Dawn (n) -the beginning or rise of anything
13) Discos (n) -a style of popular music for dancing, usually recorded with complex electronic instrumentation in which simple, repetitive lyrics are subordinated to a heavy, pulsating, rhythmic beat
14) Panache (n) -a grand or flamboyant manner
15) Piety (n) -reverence of God or devout fulfillment of religious obligations 

      16)      Cadence (n) –a rhythmic flow of a sequence of sounds or words

      17)      Crutch (n) –anything that serves a temporary and often inappropriate support, supplement or substitute

      18)      Frenetic (adj) –distracted, frantic frenzied

      19)      Inconspicuously (adj) –noticeable, prominent

      20)      Squandering (v) –to spend or use extravagantly or wastefully; sattered

What can YOU do?

http://www.thechangeblog.com/how-to-make-a-difference/

My masterpiece field: Helping Others

• Any small thing can help no matter what it can be; the smallest things sometimes make the biggest differences
• If you don't have money or material things to offer the two best gifts you can ever offer are love and happiness
• You can make huge changes by helping others one at a time and empowering others one by one is the best way to make massive changes
• Try not to let things be just a one time thing, seek long-lasting effects
• Teach people things that they are able to continue to do without you on their own
• Lead the way for others and not just wait for something to happen 
• Place yourself in others' shoes to always understand what they may be going through at the time

5 Vocab Words

1) Faux (adj) -artificial or imitation
2) Fruition (n) -attainment of anything desired; enjoyment
3) Gratifications (n) -great satisfaction
4) Levanter (n) - a strong Easterly wind in the Mediterranean 
5) Neogolize (v) -to make or use new words to create meanings for existing words

Mental, Physical and Verbal Abuse

http://www.goodtherapy.org/therapy-for-control-issues.html

My masterpiece field: Helping Others

• Abuse- Mental, verbal and physical abuse are extremely common in many households but to take action one must take a stand for themselves immediately when they feel like they are being taken advantage of
• Why does it happen? -This happens because that person themselves either have too many insecurities or they simply seek power and making themselves feel superior to others when this is how no relationship should work if it is a real one for that matter
• Why do people do it? -Many remain silent over fear and this is perfectly understandable until a certain point because eventually if they do not find help for themselves, it might soon be too late
• What are some of the causes? -Low self-esteem, emotional heartache and pain, failing, losing someone, being blamed for many things, not feeling loved
• What is the point? -There is no positive outcome from any of these situations, therefore, none of this should be happening to anyone 

5 Vocab

1) Deem (v) -to form or have an opinion, to judge
2) Exhibit (v) -to offer or expose to view
3) Hostility (n) -antagonism, enmity, unfriendliness  
4) Orchestrate (v) -to arrange or manipulate, especially by means of clever or thorough planning or maneuvering
5) Relinquish (v) -to renounce, surrender, to give up 

Benefits for you as a volunteer!

http://www.worldvolunteerweb.org/resources/how-to-guides/volunteer/doc/benefits-of-volunteering.html

My masterpiece field: Helping others

Benefits of Volunteering for the Individual

-Learn or develop a completely new and useful skill that can be passed on to others
-Become a real part of your community and leave your mark to be commemorated 
-Sense of actually achieving something worthwhile in your lifetime 
-Making changes whether they are physical, mental or emotional
-Improve chances of finding a simple job that you may otherwise not have found as easily
-Perhaps locate a career in your specialized volunteering area 
-Expand your horizons to mental places many have not yet been able to experience
-Experience new things that you may not have if it was not for this activity
-Establish connections and develop new acquaintances that could potentially be beneficial to you in the future

5 Vocab Words

1) Commercialism (n) -the principles, practices and spirit of commerce; inappropriate or excessive emphasis on profit
2) Dawn (n) -the beginning or rise of anything
3) Discos (n) -a style of popular music for dancing, usually recorded with complex electronic instrumentation in which simple, repetitive lyrics are subordinated to a heavy, pulsating, rhythmic beat
4) Panache (n) -a grand or flamboyant manner
5) Piety (n) -reverence of God or devout fulfillment of religious obligations 

How to make someone's day :)

http://www.wikihow.com/Make-Someone-Happy

My masterpiece field: Helping others

• Random acts of kindness: 

      -Write them a letter     -Shoot a positive caring text     -Buy them lunch

• Emotional and moral support:

       -Provide positive advice     -Encourage them to follow their dreams     -Encourage positive choices

• Cheer them up:

      -Buy them a gift     -Do something silly     -Hug them

• Become trustworthy:

      -Do not spread their word     -Keep promises     -Never let them down

• Great listener:

       -Lend an ear     -Let them know you will always be there     -Do not interrupt, just listen

• Encourage laughter:

       -Show them something funny     -Watch a comedy together     -Reminisce good times

• Spend quality time with them:

       -Turn off electronics     -Go outside and do things together     -Do what they enjoy

• Make them feel appreciated:

       -Compliment them     -Tell them what you love about them     -Point out something not so obvious

• Give gifts randomly:

       -Provide something suitable for them     -Range from various interests     -Share favorite dessert

5 Vocab Words

      1)      Cadence (n) –a rhythmic flow of a sequence of sounds or words

      2)      Crutch (n) –anything that serves a temporary and often inappropriate support, supplement or substitute

      3)      Frenetic (adj) –distracted, frantic frenzied

      4)      Inconspicuously (adj) –noticeable, prominent

      5)      Squandering (v) –to spend or use extravagantly or wastefully; sattered

Spring List #4

Accolade (n) –any award, honor or notice

Acerbity (n) –sourness with roughness or astringency of taste

Attrition (n) –a wearing down or weakness of resistance

Bromide (n) –a person who is very boring

Chauvinist (n) –blindly patriotic; or person who believes on gender is superior to the other

Chronic (adj) –constant, habitual, recurring frequently

Expound (v) –state in detail, explain and interpret

Factionalism (adj) –self interested

Immaculate (adj) –spotless, free from moral blemish or impurity

Imprecation (n) –the act of cursing; malediction

Ineluctable (adj) –inevitable, unstoppable, unavoidable

Mercurial (adj) –lively, changeable, animated

Palliate (v) –to relieve or lessen without curing; mitigate, alleviate

Protocol (n) –the customs and regulations dealing with diplomatic formality, precedence, etiquette

Resplendent (adj) –shinning brilliantly, gleaming, splendid

Stigmatize (v) –to set some mark of disgrace

Sub Rosa (n) –confidentially, secretly, privately

Vainglory (n) –excessive pride over one’s own achievements, abilities

Vestige (n) –a mark trace or physical evidence of something that is no longer in existence

Volition (n) –exercise of willing; choosing, resolving

   1)      Many students do not receive enough recognition for their accolades.

   2)       The soups I was being presented with obtained a strange acerbity as I tasted them.

   3)      Developing a habit of engaging in a sport can help many conquer their personal attritions.

   4)      Substitute students have a stigma of possessing a bromide personality.

   5)      We live in a society where many male chauvinists are common.

   6)      Harmful diseases can normally reach a chronic stage.

   7)      I would much prefer to read an expounded version of the bible than to attempt to interpret most of it              myself.

   8)      Many politicians grow to become very factual.

   9)      Society lacks immaculate teenagers nowadays.

   10)  Imprecations are something invented by human beings.

   11)  The fall was completely ineluctable, there was simply nothing we could do.

   12)  Her mercurial attitude changed everyone’s moods every single day. 

   13)  He palliated me in my time of need and assistance.

   14)  Protocols are beginning to become more and more complex as the years go by. 

   15)  The shooting star was truly one of the most resplendent ones I had ever seen in my lifetime.

   16)  Humans tend to stigmatize each and every individuals lives far too much.

   17)  The counselors who keep things sub rosa will continue to be able to help others as much as needed.

   18)  I have a couple of friends whose vainglory has caused them to loose many of the people they love.

   19)  Vestiges are our only reference to past world history discoveries.

   20)  Students are not accustomed to embracing their true volition because they have been brainwashed all their     lives. 

EVERYONE SHOULD READ THIS!

I was interested in reading something worth reading so I typed in "something worth reading" on Google and this amazing post popped up. Distinctly explaining the way everyone should live their lives in order to be truly content with themselves, I realized this is exactly what I have been going through for about the past two years and it is unfortunate that many will not experience this realization until they are in a far later stage of their lives. 

Link: http://johnsegocentricworld.blogspot.com/2012/04/something-worth-reading.html

"Something worth reading"

Read this and wanted to pass it on.

There comes a time in your life when you finally get it... When in the midst of all your fears and insanity you stop dead in your tracks and somewhere the voice inside your head cries out- ENOUGH! Enough fighting and crying or struggling to hold on. And, like a child quieting down after a blind tantrum, your sobs begin to subside, you shudder once or twice, you blink back your tears and through a mantle of wet lashes you begin to look at the world from a new perspective. This is your awakening.

You realize that it is time to stop hoping and waiting for something, or someone, to change or for happiness, safety and security to come galloping over the next horizon. You come to terms with the fact that there aren’t always fairytale endings (or beginnings for that matter) and that any guarantee of "happily ever after " must begin with you. Then a sense of serenity is born of acceptance.

So you begin making your way through the "reality of today" rather than holding out for the "promise of tomorrow." You realize that much of who you are, and the way you navigate through life is, in great part, a result of all the social conditioning you’ve received over the course of a lifetime. And you begin to sift through all the nonsense you were taught about:

how you should look and how much you should weigh
what you should wear and where you should shop
where you should live or what type of car you should drive
who you should sleep with and how you should behave
who you should marry and why you should stay
the importance of having children or what you owe your family
Slowly you begin to open up to new worlds and different points of view. And you begin reassessing and redefining who you are and what you really believe in. And you begin to discard the doctrines you have outgrown, or should never have practiced to begin with.

You accept the fact that you are not perfect and that not everyone will love, appreciate or approve of who or what you are... and that’s OK... they are entitled to their own views and opinions. And, you come to terms with the fact that you will never be a size 5 or a "perfect 10" Or a perfect human being for that matter. So you stop trying to compete with the image inside your head or agonizing over how you compare. And you take a long look at yourself in the mirror and you make a promise to give yourself the same unconditional love and support you give so freely to others. Then a sense of confidence is born of self-approval.

And, you stop maneuvering through life merely as a "consumer" hungry for your next fix, a new dress, another pair of shoes or looks of approval and admiration from family, friends or even strangers who pass by. Then you discover that it is truly in giving that we receive and that the joy and abundance you seek grows out of the giving. And you recognize the importance of "creating" & "contributing" rather than "obtaining " & "accumulating."

And you give thanks for the simple things you’ve been blessed with; things that millions of people upon the face of the earth can only dream about a full refrigerator, clean running water, a soft warm bed and the freedom to pursue your own dreams.

And then you begin to love and to care for yourself. You stop engaging in self-destructive behaviors including participating in dysfunctional relationships. You begin eating a balanced diet, drinking more water and exercising. And because you’ve learned that fatigue drains the spirit and creates doubt and fear, you give yourself permission to rest. And just as food is fuel for the body, laughter is fuel for the spirit and so you make it a point to create time for play.

Then you learn about love and relationships, how to love, how much to give in love, when to stop giving and when to walk away. And you allow only the hands of a lover who truly loves and respects you to glorify you with his touch. You learn that people don’t always say what they mean or mean what they say, intentionally or unintentionally and that not everyone will always come through and interestingly enough, it’s not always about you. So, you stop lashing out and pointing fingers or looking to place blame for the things that were done to you or weren’t done for you. And you learn to keep your Ego in check and to acknowledge and redirect the destructive emotions it spawns; anger, jealousy and resentment.

You learn how to say I was wrong and to forgive people for their own human frailties. You learn to build bridges instead of walls and about the healing power of love as it is expressed through a kind word, a warm smile or a friendly gesture. And, at the same time, you eliminate any relationships that are hurtful or fail to uplift and edify you. You stop working so hard at smoothing things over and setting your needs aside. You learn that feelings of entitlement are perfectly OK and that it is your right to want or expect certain things. And you learn the importance of communicating your needs with confidence and grace. You learn that the only cross to bear is the one you choose to carry and that eventually martyrs are burned at the stake. Then you learn to distinguish between guilt, and responsibility and the importance of setting boundaries and learning to say NO. You learn that you don’t know all the answers, it’s not your job to save the world and that sometimes you just need to Let Go.

Moreover, you learn to look at people as they really are and not as you would want them to be, and you are careful not to project your neediness or insecurities onto a relationship. You learn that you will not be, more beautiful, more intelligent, more lovable or important because of the man on your arm or the child that bears your name. You learn that just as people grow and change, so it is with love and relationships and that that not everyone can always love you the way you would want them to. So you stop appraising your worth by the measure of love you are given. And suddenly you realize that it’s wrong to demand that someone live their life or sacrifice their dreams just to serve your needs, ease your insecurities, or meet "your " standards and expectations. You learn that the only love worth giving and receiving is the love that is given freely without conditions or limitations. And you learn what it means to love. So you stop trying to control people, situations and outcomes. You learn that "alone" does not mean "lonely" and you begin to discover the joy of spending time "with yourself" and "on yourself." Then you discover the greatest and most fulfilling love you will ever know. Self Love. And so, it comes to pass that through understanding your heart heals; and now all new things are possible.

Moving along, you begin to avoid Toxic people and conversations. And you stop wasting time and energy rehashing your situation with family and friends. You learn that talk doesn’t change things and that unrequited wishes can only serve to keep you trapped in the past. So, you stop lamenting over what could or should have been and you make a decision to leave the past behind. Then you begin to invest your time and energy to affect positive change. You take a personal inventory of all your strengths and weaknesses and the areas you need to improve in order to move ahead. You set your goals and map out a plan of action to see things through.

You learn that life isn’t always fair and you don’t always get what you think you deserve and you stop personalizing every loss or disappointment. You learn to accept that sometimes bad things happen to good people and that these things are not an act of God... but merely a random act of fate.

And you stop looking for guarantees because you’ve learned that the only thing you can really count on is the unexpected and that whatever happens, you’ll learn to deal with it. And you learn that the only thing you must truly fear is the great robber baron of all time FEAR itself. So you learn to step right into and through your fears because to give into fear is to give away the right to live life on your terms. You learn that much of life truly is a self-fulfilling prophesy and you learn to go after what you want and not to squander your life living under a cloud of indecision or feelings of impending doom.

Slowly, you begin to take responsibility for yourself by yourself and you make yourself a promise to never betray yourself and to never ever settle for less than your heart’s desire. Then a sense of power is born of self-reliance. And you live with honor and integrity because you know that these principles are not the outdated ideals of a by-gone era but the mortar that holds together the foundation upon which you must build your life. And you make it a point to keep smiling, to keep trusting and to stay open to every wonderful opportunity and exciting possibility. Then you hang a wind chime outside your window to remind yourself what beauty there is in Simplicity.

Finally, with courage in your heart and with God by your side you take a stand, you FAKE a deep breath and you begin to design the life you want to live as best as you can

A word about the Power of Prayer: In some of my darkest, most painful and frightening hours, I have prayed not for the answers to my prayers or for material things but for my "God" to help me find the strength, confidence and courage to persevere; to face each day and to do what I must do.

Remember this: "You are an expression of the almighty. The spirit of God resides within you and moves through you. Open your heart, speak to that spirit and it will heal and empower you." My "God" has never failed me.

Spring List #3

Apostate (n) –a person who forsakes his religion, cause or party

Effusive (adj) –unduly demonstrative; lacking reserve

Impasse (n) –a position or situation from which there is no escape; deadlock

Euphoria (n) –a state of intense happiness and self-confidence

Lugubrious (adj) –formal, dismay or gloomly

Bravado (n) –a pretentious display of courage

Consensus (n) –general agreement; majority of opinion

Dichotomy (n) –subdivision into two parts

Constrict (v) –contract, shrink or to press in

Gothic (adj) -16th century; characterized by the use of the pointed arch and the ribbed vault, by the use of fine woodwork and stonework, by a progressive lightening of structure, and by the use of such features as flying buttresses, ornamental gables, crockets, and foils

Punctilio (n) –fine point, detailed, exactness

Metamorphosis (n) –a complete change of form, structure and substance

Raconteur (n) –a person skilled in telling stories

Sine qua non (n) –an indispensable condition, element or factor

Quixotic (adj) –extravagantly chivalrous, romantic, visionary, impractical

Vendetta (n) –any prolonged and bitter feud, rivalry, contention

Non sequitur (n) –a statement containing an illogical solution

Mystique (n) -an aura of mystery or mystical power surrounding a particular occupation or pursuit

Quagmire (n) –a situation from which extrication is very difficult

Parlous (adj) –perilous, dangerous

      1)      The apostate was severely shunned when he decided to convert.

      2)      The paper was far too effusive lacking quality rather than quantity.

      3)      It was clear that we were in an impasse situation realizing there was absolutely nothing we could do.

      4)      One will only reach euphoria when one is able to recognize and look past his or her own flaws and live for themselves rather than for pleasing others.

      5)      Her presence brought upon a lugubrious feel to others no matter where she went.

      6)      He was nicknamed “El Bravado“ for running inside the burning house to save his family.

      7)      We reached a consensus when we began discussing money terms.

      8)      The dichotomy of the project seemed largely unfair for one side.

      9)      I found it difficult to constrict the clay in my hands while it was still fairly wet.

    10)  The church I visited in the Dominican Republic was built in a gothic style.

    11)  His masterpiece absolutely needed to be of punctilio to the point where he was fully content with it before placing it for sale.

    12)  Butterflies are some of the many insects who must experience a metamorphosis in order to continue with its life.

    13)  My grandmother was the best raconteur I had ever known and once she passed, there was no replace for her in the world.

    14)  Her precious meals’ were of the best sine qua non that no one dared to throw away even after they were sufficiently full.

    15)  Every woman expects a quixotic prince charming when they wed, and every woman deserves one.

    16)  My family held a vendetta for the man that broke my older sister’s poor little heart.

    17)  It was as if every time he spoke, he meant to make these irrelevant, non sequitur comments about every situation.

    18)  When I am with him, it is as if we are in an entirely new mystique world.

    19)  I always seemed to find myself in a quagmire situation when I searched for all my tennis balls.

    20)  I knew that night would be far more parlous than any other due to the traffic jam from the holidays.